Hey my loves aka my readers!,
Surprise post you can say, lol. I just posted two poems I’ve been meaning to post from out of my phone. I always write random material as I’m laying in bed or before falling asleep, best time to write. But these aren’t that recent a few months back you can say. A little of what’s going on in my personal situations but not all the way. I like to add my personal experience in my poetry but I like to add in imagination too. Either way a good poem is bound to be made, lol. I’ve been on chill mode and thinking about where my emotions stand for the people I’m talking too currently. I am very single go course but I’m really trying to DATE. I don’t mind adding to my roster, lol. I can’t fully say I know what it feels like to date so I want to experience dating and just being single. I’ve been single for over 5 years well technically for about 3 months I was in something BUT I don’t count it as a “serious relationship” although real feelings were developed I don’t include it as a real relationship. But yeah 5 years+ and I haven’t been on a real date. This generation is something else I will say and I be feeling like I need to go back in time lol I”m old fashion. I like guys to open the door for me, respect me and pay for the date lol. These days manners and respect just go out the window. Everyone want “swag” and not a grown man. Swag is cute but being a grown ass man is sexy sorry I’ll take a grown man before swag. Swag will grab my attention but the grown man status will make a things 10 times better for me and you. I’m trying to get on my grown woman and go to the highest level I can so therefore I need someone who can compliment that.
I have someone who loves me full heartedly and he always tells me he loves me. We been talking for awhile but I just can’t seem to open up the way he has. I think it’s because of what I have been through already PLUS I’m sorting out me feelings for my ex kinda still. My ex reintroduced love into my life so that is a big deal to me because love wasn’t in my vocabulary prior to him because of my first love. So yes recently I’ve spoken to my ex who I have much love for I won’t deny that at all. He loves me as well but our situation is so crazy and the dynamics of our relationship is so complex it’s best at this time we don’t be until we figure out where our individuals lives are going. Then I think about where I am by myself and how comfortable I am with love one on one. I have an obsession with love and I’ve accepted it, lol. I also know that I can’t do a one night stand or just be someone’s “side chick”. Not only because it’s not in my character but because I am a relationship kind of female. So I won’t put myself in situations where I know dude is looking for a quick nut then bounce. No firsthand I will tell you what it is or bounce. I don’t want to waste your time nor mine. I’m focused on my career(s) so if you don’t like my priorities or where I’m trying to go you can’t be apart of my life. I surely refuse to settle for anything than THE BEST.
Ladies it’s important to know yourself and your limitations. If I know first hand I’m emotional and can’t do the whole “f*ck buddy” thing I won’t even lead the guy on that I can do so. I’m not looking to do that. I honestly think females who try to do it are crazy because we are FEMALES we are emotional regardless of how hard core we appear to be OR THINK WE ARE A DUDE. Dudes can do it without having a care in the world. NO YOU ARE A FEMALE. Not right off the bat will you have feelings or care BUT as time goes on boo boo the tables will turn. It is what it is. Be real from jump with yourself and HIM. I’ve had plenty of guys recently tell me they wanna do this and that but I tell them look I like, I know if you asked me to be your girlfriend I’d be down so therefore no we can’t, I’m emotional. Once emotions get involved it’s a wrap for me. Lol so I’m just glad I’m able to be real with myself and guys I talk too. Most guys like the fact I’m so real because it saves a lot of time from being wasted. I don’t like to waste time at all. Another thing PLEASE GO SEE THINK LIKE A MAN! The book is by Steve Harvey and I’m about to re-read the book because it will refresh my thoughts and etc. I personal love Steve and I appreciate him telling us how men are wired and how they are. I have guy friends who I go to all the time to help me determine what to do. I need that because I can’t always read guys, lol so I have my guy friends do it for me. Lol.
Just a random post of the day! I hope you enjoyed my randomness. ❤
Love, Peace and Honesty!,