Random Thoughts…{Venting}

Hello my loves aka my readers,

So I’ve been annoyed and irritated like shit today for some reason. I honestly go to sleep when I get like that frustrated and annoyed with things, people, situations or in general because I don’t have to think about it anymore in my sleep. My ex use to be the one who I told my stuff to but since he’s gone I’ve had to kind of find different ways to deal. It’s been a blower not having that “one” to just vent too because I go through much in a day span. Between my household, family, my strive to become more than I am, my dreams and just everyday struggles I go through it. That’s another reason I’m kind of shying away from relationships right now because I know I can be much to work with emotionally but if you a real man you can put up with it all if you love me right? That’s how I think about it. BUt I’m frustrated because there’s just so much I need starting with a job in my field. I have been out of college coming up on a year in June and I am BORED OUT MY MIND. I don’t do much because I’m pretty much looking for a job and working on my book in the meanwhile. It’s frustrating and I’m running out of things to do besides pray. I love what I want to do and doing it I just can’t wait to do. As a woman I enjoy my independency and doing what I want to do with my own money. So this part time gig not kicking it at all! When I was in college just doing small stuff it was enough but I’m stepping into my prime and trying to spread my wings so I have more I’m getting into I need big money to really get it in especially saving to move out.

Babygirl has been on the brain as well heavy too I guess because her “Behind the music” came on and I’ve been listening other music more these days. Aaliyah just brings me back to the basics and I love that. She reminds me what I’m pushing for and she sings whats in my heart. I miss Aaliyah a lot to be honest and before she passed I was listening to her music heavy almost like how I am right now. It’s almost unexplainable how I connected to Aaliyah and how I loved her music. Like I connect my life with music and I listen to majority R&B then when I’m in a club mood I listen to Hip-Hop but Aaliyah had that sweet street swag. Plus that mystery behind her eyes because she kept her life so private and I enjoy that. It’s important to me that her legacy continues to grow and go on. Her spirit is still here with her fans and people who loved her most. She was blossoming at a rapid rate when she passed because she had an album, a model and about to drop movies so I felt like she lost her life in the middle of her prime.It’s scary because she was only 22 and it makes me not take things or people for granted because we can be here one day but gone the next ya know? Rest in paradise Aaliyah

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