Hey my readers!…,
Its been awhile since I’ve posted anything! I took some time to observe life, create some poem titles, look inside myself and just try to push even more than I am. I’ve been working steadily on my book manuscript and I am so excited about getting to the finish line. As usual life has been throwing me some curve balls but honestly I’m learning just to let God handle situations that I’m too emotionally close with, can’t handle or I just don’t have control over ya know? Like at the end of the day I’m only human and no lie I’m very strong, I’ve been told so many times I am which took me a very long time to figure out how I am. Lol but I think it’s how I deal with situations and just the strength that I show when being thrown negativity or situations. I do have a team who I confide in all the time because they know me very well and they know my heart as well. So I consider my teams opinions then listen to how I feel then give it to GOD. Sometimes I feel so lost and don’t know what to do that I cry at first. Frustration does carry a load, lol. But I do end up following my gut and my instincts. There’s been times when certain situations and people had to be let go. Not because I didn’t love them or something DRAMATIC had to happen just because I grew out of that season meaning I grew out of the situation! I honestly can say if I don’t talk to someone or if I let someone out of my life it’s because I’m growing as a woman. I’ve always said progress is what matters to me MOST, I know that at the end of the day all I have is myself and where I see myself is important more than holding onto a dead end situation with people who don’t understand me, don’t care for me like I do for them or just love me in general. Any friendship or RELATIONSHIP takes two. One person can not do it all so when I feel like I’m being taken advantage of or just feel as if I’m not being respected something has to change! So before the situation takes to much of an tole on me or already has…I let the person go. So I’m guessing that’s where the strength is shown?…*shrug*
Okay well the manuscript is on Chapter 11! I get so emotional through writing this book manuscript because I’m being so raw and real to a point I’m going through these rough situations all over again. But I know that the end result is what I have my eyes on…the prize aka my final published book. It’s exciting I tell you. Only one person has read the introduction and she liked it thus far. If I can help one person or affect one life by my own personal experiences than I’m good. I do want to be a best seller because that’s a milestone in itself but honesty it’s about the content and reasoning behind the book itself. My intentions for this book is to spread my wisdom, spread love and be real. Being real in my eyes means you can be real with yourself, comfortable with who you are, your situation and be able to embrace whatever comes your way. If you can’t be real with yourself, how can you be real with others? The truth will hurt but a lie will hurt even more than the truth already is. It’s not fun hearing what you DON’T want to hear or don’t want to deal with but it’s your reality. One way or the other you have to deal with what’s real. Being fake towards someone, fake towards a situation and just being fake in general will not do anything but cause pain and it’s a lie. So I mean my advice to anyone going through anything is talk to someone who is going to be cut throat honest and will not tell you what you want to hear. Sometimes its what we need especially going through rough situations!
I got a few things on my mind…I think it’s crazy how females change when they have a man? I’m talking about a whole 360. Just because you get a man don’t mean you cut off your life for his. Yeah, I said it, lol. You have to learn balance because if not when that “boy” leaves…you will have no friends. Who do you tell your secrets too? Who do you confide in? It’s no fun just having a man, not being a male basher but I’m saying you have to learn what it is to be able to maintain a relationship and still be a friend and have friends around you. Now if your friends don’t like the person your talking too…those are issues that need to be talked about. Honestly when your inside a relationship the perspective is totally different when its someone outside o the relationship. So the perceptions are very different. You can trust your man but you don’t rule out the unknown. Always love yourself more than the person your with. One thing I’ve done before was love Alan more than I loved myself that’s when I lost myself in him so that’s when things changed quickly. I lost my focus and I didn’t know who I was. Lol, I can’t speak too much on this because it’s in my book but just know who you are and don’t lose it within loving someone else who don’t lose themselves within you. When you can feel the love returned and your growing within that love with your partner than go for it. Don’t be an option to someone who you as an priority. It’s not a good feeling and don’t run from a situation because you’ve ran out of things to do. If you can’t find a resolution to the problems in your relationship or you just put entirely too much energy into someone…don’t run from the situation….deal with it meaning let that person go. At the end your only hurting yourself and limiting yourself to someone your in a dead end relationship with. Alright I’m done for now!!! I will be posting some poems, not new but good poems that will motivate you and get you hungry for the book itself!!!!!! Muah….keep reading my post, I appreciate all the feedback and opinions!
Love, Peace and Honesty,